Irritability.....UGH!!!

Am I the only one??  One of my most frustrating symptoms is Irritability!!!  I know that some of this is caused from being in pain - it seems to make my fuse a little shorter.  Sometimes it just sneaks up on me and I blast off with no warning.  My hubby is a little oblivious at times to what triggers these outbreaks and I feel horrible when I snap.  It feels like my nerves have been roughed up with sand paper at times and the least little thing will set me off.  Today the impetus was cracking ice by the hubs .....  even after the offensive noise or irritant stops, I am still feeling raw.  It's as if I have been plugged into the wall and electrified - truly.

Now here's the rub, I have taken Excedrin for the pain which contains caffeine and had one cup of coffee to try and move just a little.  So if I take something to soften the blow of the electrification, then I am a zombie with negative energy - not just tired but totally wiped out.  So there is the daily choice of being on the edge or a lump on the couch.  I realize there are other drugs out there for the pain and I do use some other NSAIDs at times but I cannot take narcotics and I have a very low threshold for drugs in general - another words a very little goes a long way.

So - I try to explain again that startling me, waking me up from a deep sleep for no good reason, or making extremely irritating noises just may cause a backlash that I cannot control.  Nothing horrific but unpleasant just the same.  Let's take note - Mom does not do well with certain irritations so unless there is a compelling reason for them, we won't go there today.  We will all be happier around here and we will all live to see another day.....

Weather and It's Effects.......

Do you have big swings in how you feel when the weather changes?  I sure do and sometimes I just can't get my head around it.  I am fortunate that I live in a relatively warm climate in the south and at some points during the year, I see significant improvement.  But any extreme will cause a halt in my progress and send me reeling backwards.

Right now we are having some cold wet weather and little sunshine and it is very hard to get myself out of bed and even harder to get dressed or move.  Pain is throbbing in all sorts of places and nothing I do seems to quiet the rage my body is sending out.  I truly don't know what I would do if I lived up north or anywhere where there was significant cold weather for long periods of time.  More than likely I would be in bed or huddled on the couch for those months.

As it stands now, I have pretty clear ups and downs associated with the weather and the time of the year.  My norm is to be fairly down and out November through March or so depending on how early Spring comes.  I am just so very thankful that there is a reprieve and things do improve when it is warm but not too hot.

Heat brings about it's own issues and July and August can bring on other issues such as extreme fatigue, sweating and shortness of breath but not as much pain.  So my best months are somewhere in April and possibly May and Fall months of October and maybe November.  I would have to say that Winter is the worst unless it is very mild.

I have also begun to realize that diet plays into this range of temperatures.  If I eat lots of foods that cause inflammation such as those we normally have at Thanksgiving, then I will exacerbate the effects of the cold or heat - whichever is the case.  So I am trying to learn the signals and fight the fight before I am totally down and out.

Please know that none of this is mentioned in an effort to complain, just to think out loud and share information that may make it easier for us all.  I have been on this path for quite a while and if I can help someone who is not as far along, then I would surely want to do that.  I wish you all of you and those who love you a cozy and warm Winter!

To Do or Not To Do......

I have talked about the idea of making decisions on energy consumption and the benefits versus the downside before.  What???  What I mean is that for those of us with a chronic illness, going out or doing things must be weighed with what the consequences may be.  For me, I can occasionally go out to a function, shopping or a visit somewhere but I am always aware there will be a cost and sometimes it is bigger than I anticipate.  Over time I have learned ways to lessen the damage and to make the down time a little shorter after an outing.  If something comes up and I have not had time to plan, then I will surely pay the price and so will my family.

Another thing we always must be aware of is that my ability to do something can change from day to day so planning is always noted with the fact that I will if I can.  Unless it is something very important, many times I do need to change my plans and make the decision to stay home and rest.  Life goes much smoother and is more enjoyable when I listen to the signs and realize that today is not going to be the day and that is okay.  One of the most important lessons that I have learned is just because you can does not mean you should!  Lots of trial and error and long bouts of being down and out have taught me this all important rule.

Another issue that rears it's ugly head for me is that when there are plans and something that I am looking forward to, I have the tendency to get over excited and not be able to sleep.  That is the surest way that my plans will need to be cancelled.  Extra rest is necessary to be able to get out and enjoy something and without sleep, I am headed for disaster for days on end.

Last night my hubby and I went out, got dressed up and attended a local charity event that was important to us and part of his job at times.  While we were walking to the convention center where the event was held, I mentioned to him that some people looking at me would thing that I look absolutely fine and would be appalled to know that I am on disability.  My hubby quickly replied that if they knew what I had to go through before and after doing something like that, then they would understand.  It was a short evening and of course we came home and back into jammies I went and collapsed on the couch......but for me it was worth it and we had a really nice time.  Today will be a day of recouping and that's okay too because we made the decision to expend that energy and did so wisely.  Just like the spoonie adage, we must chose wisely to make life more liveable!